Tuesday 28 August 2018

Dealing with a lie

It is not anything glamorous when we realised our kids told us a lie. Big or little lie, it will always be a parent's concern. We never know when lying may become a convenient habit. And perhaps, every child, in a way or another would have told a lie. Like what the world says, lying is normal and is associated to intelligence.  Even so, we only want the truth.

Though I think they were mostly honest when they say their Mama is beautiful!

So this was our story. I love Maltesers. The chocolate, you know? I had a pack of it in our snack basket. And one day when I walked past it, I found an empty wrapper! I gathered the kids to ask who sneaked those chocs into their tummy. No one. And I am pretty sure it was no one else, but kids. Who else is capable of leaving empty wrappers intended for the bin? My kids do that occasionally. 

I doubtfully accepted 'Not me' as their reply. And of course, I didn't find it convincing. I told the man, who decided to re-investigate. 

He told the kids that it must be their littlest brother, Juboy since there was no confession. And since he wasn't present at investigation scene, it was easy to find an accuse. Juboy was under my eye care almost every hour, I can definitely sniff it out if it was him. He is still at the stage of discovering how to open wrappers. Nonetheless, the man told the kids that Juboy will be punished for gobbling chocolates and irresponsibly leaving trash wrapper around.


When I heard it, I smiled heart in my heart. I knew it was an inspiration from the Bible. The story in 1 Kings 3: 16 shared about two woman who stood before the king over the ownership of a living child. Both women gave birth 3 days apart in the same house. One woman had her son dead, and the other woman had her son living. The woman whose son was dead claimed that the living son was hers. King Solomon then ordered to divide the living child into two! So each woman gets half. Very naturally, the woman whose son was living pleaded to give her son to the other woman and by no means kill the child. And the other woman said, "Let him neither be mine nor yours, but divide him."

The wise King knew who the mother was and gave the living child to her.

This is one of my favourite story in the Bible. Similarly, we worked with the element of compassion. I didn't know if that will spur any effect on anyone's guilt or if we will be getting any confession. I only knew, there was a sacrifice, there was a blame and everyone could escape free from this episode knowing their little brother could shoulder the name of chocolate thief.

A few hours later, that very night. I spotted a confession note on my desk. We gotten a confession! No frustration and struggles.

Note says:
"Dear Mummy, it was me who ate the maltesers. Please do not cane Juboy. You can cane me instead. I am terribly sorry."

And there was a sign off.

We uncovered truth! Though my heart was a slight troubled with the thought of why this child was too frightened to confess instantly. Not that we do not allow chocolates in the house, but moderately. And I do get a little frenzy when they don't get things to the right place. Empty wrappers, bottles, dishes not at the right place drives my nerves a little. I must have been horrifying during those moments. 

We were glad that confession came. And nope, there wasn't any scolding or punishment. We applauded courage, we celebrated delayed honesty and we gave Thanks for hope. Hope that compassion moved in our hearts. Parenting is truly God led at times, we don't have to always take the harsh or impatient way out. We will get there! Have patient and give time.  

And no prize for guessing the real culprit. Either him or her.

How do you deal with a lie?

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