Thursday, 21 June 2012

Talkative Thursday - Talking to kids

Talkative Thursday suggests that I have loads of thoughts to share, so be warned on this post's length. Get coffee ready.

Over the week, I've been thinking about my life journey to date. I'm today a mother of two, and being a parent isn’t easy. You have to live up to that title constantly well, before and behind the kids. I aspire to be a great Mother, one that my kids will ask to be like as they grow along.

Easier said than done, I don’t have the wows of character that are good examples for them, but I’m constantly trying to get better. As I’ve grown, I modelled to learn and take on the positives of my parents. They aren’t perfect, only much to realizing when I’m a grown up and became Mother myself, I filter their negatives, and teaching becomes reversed. Maturity is not counted in age, but with the experiences in life. While Js are still young, I want to pen something for them, on relationships while thoughts are hovering around.

Dear Js,

Every human is unique and there are people of different characters everywhere. This makes the world really interesting to live in, how boring is it if everyone behaves similarly. Let’s not expect we can change anyone, but learn to adapt differences. Someone once told me, “you should choose your friends.” I was 20 then. I disagreed because I thought, more makes it merrier, and that’s peak of life when we have time for all friends. As I progressed, I realized she was so true! We don’t have time for everyone; let’s choose friends wisely, friends that we can accept the most of our indifferences. It’s waste of time and efforts on friends who don’t value you. Quality is better than quantity. Your Daddy often tells me, friends come and go. So true! I’ve lost some friends due to very diverse interests along the way. And adding to the list, I've gained some really good friends who accepted who I am and love all of you too. Best friends are not defined in years, but the comfort and joy of enjoying each other’s companion.

On us being a good friend, always present ourselves as thoughtful sincere individuals. Accept invites, don’t take too long to reply your attendance, it’s nice to even reply, “Thanks for the invite, let me get back to you soon”. Even if you can’t make it, send a nice present or message over. Sincerity melts one’s heart, how wrong can this go? True friends don’t get jealous, we feel their every moment. Don't hesitate to apologize, should you need to. Face up to wrong doings and not shun from them. Mostly importantly, don’t do things that you wouldn’t want others to do unto you. Go for the right people, people who will help and feel you, people who inspire and motivate you, people who do not hide truths from you. Sincerity!

It’s always said to live life the way you want it, in reality, that’s not so possible. You have to think of the consequences - Is anyone upset with your decision, Daddy or Mummy? Is anyone hurt or put to a spot just for your personal gains? Think before you speak and act. Use our hands well for the acts of kind service, render help to those in need, even if they were once your enemies. I know how much it is to dislike someone; good deeds allow us to release that hatred and anger gradually. Say a nice prayer for our enemies. Easier said than done, but let’s try. Use our mouth well, tame those words, and think before you speak. Give words of praises and be slow to anger. Words are like swords, harmful words pierce through a person and hurts badly. Don’t create such mess for anyone. Being humorous is fun, but overly humorous can fade the line between jokes and destructive words. Mummy’s a sensitive being, and to some, a good or bad. A good level of sensitivity prompts you to be careful when handling humans. Let’s be wise on that. Use our ears well, listen when others are talking. There's a reason why God gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth. I know it’s tiring when someone over talks, but there’s always a tactful way to get out of it and let's not under listen too. Let’s practice emotional quotient at all times. 

The greatest hurts in life are from people we value most. It takes time to nurse the wounds, but heal it soon. Keeping an unattended wound causes infection. Let's release that hurt, and not infect the good parts of our body. Mummy used to do this in church, release hurts by cupping your hands before you, whisper words  of forgiveness into your cupped hands, say a prayer, open and release those burdens. Let God do the rest.
    
Always know that Mummy will be there for you all, as much as I can and as long as I can. Someday, when you build your families, and I pray you choose a great spouse. You didn’t choose your parents, but it’s a great deal to choose an ideal spouse. The best thing that happened to mummy is, marrying your daddy. If karma exists, this must be my great reward for the goods I’ve done.

The day you both were birthed, Daddy cut the umbilical cord that connected us for 38 (Jareth) and 40 (Jazz) weeks during pregnancy. That signifies your ultimate aim to go build a family of your own after independence. You are not meant to be corded to me forever. If I were to ask, a life and death question, mummy or husband/wife? Painfully, I tell you, go for your spouse, she/he is walking the rest of your life with you. I'll be happy that you carried my words along.

Human relationships are the greatest challenges in life, often the deciding factor to make one happy or unhappy. Live a life of integrity, do the right things in dark and in light. I’m not really sure if karma exists, it’s one proven in dramas but not what facts and evidences can prove. Live right!

Kids, always remember the values of being a great person. I love you all!

Mummy

Laughters -  Not to be missed in lives






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