Friday, 1 March 2013

School is Fun

It's been a week since we sent both little ones to a full 4 days preschool. One of the common reason daycare or preschool was 'invented', is for working parents who need care for their kids while at work. I'm here, not working and sending both kids to a full day school. Forgiving if it is part day school, but full day?!! My defense is that, the school we set heart on didn't have that option. Was I in the right state of mind or have I surrendered? I was all prepared to home school them. It was a decision that swarmed me into a sea of emotions - Guilt, Relieved, Happy, Unhappy and Mixed!.
  • Guilty that I'm exchanging more of those 'Me, Myself and I' moments, at the expense of them going to school. 
  • Relieved that my home duties are lighter and more paced out.
  • Happy that I've more time for stuffs that are challenging to do with 2 kids around. The 'to do' list goes on and on
  • Unhappy that quantity time with the kids are greatly reduced. I give up more opportunities for bonding. I'm not bringing home income, yet I'm spending more on those fees. How unthinkable. 
I'm still trying to balance those emotions. Perhaps making up with meaningful activities I can have with the spare time. It seemed like preschool, to me, is a place to help mums keep that peace of mind - sanity! In fact, I could have made myself a little better by keeping Jare home, and only send Jazz to school, since the elder has greater learning capacity. And thinking of half the fees I can save, it was an attractive option. But, I wasn't sure how fair or unfair this will be to one or the other child. I know Jazz loves school and Jare cries his way in. Is it more fun to be learning and socializing in school or to stay home with Mummy? What affirmed our decision was Jare's increasing capacity to learn and pick up more skills for having turned two. He needs some discipline beyond home as well.

Not that I didn't enjoy my role as a full time stay at home mum, I love doing the occasional arts and crafts, teaching academics and cooking all meals for them. And there are definitely 'I hates' in a SAHM's life too. Just that, I would love to have more personal time, especially in this beautiful place we are in. Being really truthful about this. Although it seemed kinda too much freedom now, I'm loving it. Good moments don't last, it's back to reality when we get back to our sunny country. Well, I still get great moments with the kids in the morning and evening, even much more precious than before. Separation definitely makes one's heart grow fonder.    

Nonetheless, I think it's important to drive guilt out and feel comfortable about sending them to school. My 10 comforting reasons are:

1. Social skill is what they can't pick up with me
2. The space, tools and environment for their physical and mental development is probably school
3. Peer pressure can make learning effective and fussy eaters less picky
4. There are better opportunities and new experiences to exploring art, music, language, group and individual play, indoor and outdoor play. I like it that they learn Spanish here.
5. The culture and varying ethnic is a good experience for them. Globalization!
6. Some days, when the man gets off school early. We get to date. Build marriage!
7. 'Me' time can keep a Mum sane and logical.
8. Rest! Absolutely important in keeping a Mum wise and uplifted.
9. Time for hobbies - Make a mum happy and relaxed
10. Education is an investment, never too early! Academic purpose.

I'm must be thankful for the payer of their school fees, my man, for this co-decision in sending them to school. This move relieved a great part of my various roles. I can now do things peacefully (Day home's really quiet now), do chores without breaking in between to resolve squabbles and prepare decent dinner without a clingy child. Awesomeness!

And during the first week they went school, I celebrated freedom. Had tea with fellow spouses, breakfast and shopping with my man! Life didn't seem so easy before. We know how occupied our hands are when we go out for meals or shopping with our little ones - "Don't touch, don't run, it's breakable!" I treasure separate peaceful moments with my man. 

A really good tea and good breakfast with no lap sitting kids.

Top left: First day, and he was really moody. He rejected goldfish crackers for the first time! Bottom left: Snow play! Center: Their uniforms - Walking advertisement for the school. Top right: Story time with Big sis and little bro together. Right bottom: Love the neatness of their classrooms

As I enter into the weeks of freedom, I've laid out plans and actions to make the best out of my time, for my family, for personal and for the people around me! It's now all about walking the talk, and not just talking the talk.

2 comments :

  1. babe...there is no right or wrong .but what is right for u n the family

    one fine day my J came to me n said that president obama is the president of the united states of america (proud mummy moment but there is zero contribution from me but its the effort of his class teacher reading newspaper in class)

    i reckon as a FTWM i hardly have time to read the newspaper , how to even read to the kids...

    and if as a SAHM, that would be even worst..the newspaper is to wiping windows , lining the floor during meals times...

    so i concluded my kids will fare better in school...i had a singing CNY song radio the past month..coz the teachers teaches J different chinese songs to sing...

    i do feel less guilty not being there for them 24/7 during their formative years...coz they can do much more n achieve much more in school

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  2. Thanks Jaime! U spur me up. I love it that they go to school, just that the really pinching part is myself not contributing to the home finances. Not like in SG where I worked and sent the kids to school.

    Appreciate your comforting thoughts. And please update something soon... it's stuck in Dec 2012. Haha

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